Why healing the inner child can support Highly Sensitive People and Empaths who struggle with their sensitivity.
Healing the inner child can be a very powerful way to address all sorts of forms of dis-ease, unhealthy beliefs, and conditioning. How we experience and see the world as a child often shapes how we show up as an adult. And this is no different for the highly sensitive child who can find the modern world a harsh place. Empaths and HSP’s struggle to thrive in life because in some ways they have struggled to survive their childhood.
Struggles Of The Empath And Highly Sensitive Person
No matter how healthy or unhealthy your childhood was many HSP’s and empaths struggle because of their level of sensitivity and awareness. Highly sensitive people are generally more sensitive to their own wounding and surroundings. The highly sensitive empath takes that a bit further they will feel the emotional pain of others. And some of us also take on the energetic imprint or physical pain of others.
Every HSP and Empath is unique but like everyone in life, they will feel different levels of that pain, they will also have their own personal challenges and trauma.
Inner Child Healing – The Highly Sensitive Child
The highly sensitive child/person has such heightened awareness than those around them that they can see, hear, feel, and interpret things to a greater degree than most people couldn’t imagine. The HSP child will often be viewed as too sensitive, too weak, too childlike, irrational, naive…
These natural gifts and traits often trigger fear and misunderstanding in the parents, siblings, and caregivers around them which is projected onto the child. They are often taught that who they are at a core level is flawed, bad, wrong, not enough. Told to toughen up, be brave, be bold, shut down their emotions, act differently; basically not be their sacred self.
Many highly sensitive children are highly empathic, intuitive and even psychic. This again can trigger tremendous fear in those around them which the child senses. So much so the child will shut down their natural traits, their natural state of being. That is why inner child work is highly recommended for empaths and the highly sensitive person.
Increased Empowerment From Healing The Inner Child
So many highly sensitive people including highly sensitive children often don’t know where they fit in. This can create a great degree of inner conflict especially when we are living in a very noisy, materialistic society. A culture that is often embedded with self-preservation and self-success than any on compassion and deep humanity for others around us.
Inner Child work can be extremely healing for the HSP who struggles to honour themself and their sensitivity. It is empowering for the empath or HSP who can’t say no and struggles with boundaries. For those who too easily take on other people’s drama or pain.
In my one to one sessions and inner child programs for sensitives and empaths. I address different aspects of the inner child. Working on the wounded child, abandoned child, the eternal child and the more positive aspects of the inner child. It is extremely healing and empowering to address underlying triggers where you felt traumatised, abandoned or disempowered. Those experiences where we have shut down mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually.
Unlock Your Gifts From Healing The Inner Child
Clients and therapists experience many benefits and insights from inner child work. Even simply listening to inner child healing guided meditations that have been created by someone qualified to do. Because so many HSP’s haven’t learned to own and harness their sensitive gifts in a positive way. You may not recognise that some of your physical symptoms are just signs your gifts are trying to show up. Or maybe you need to start owning your power, your sovereignty.
Maybe you need to say NO? Stop allowing others to take advantage, control, or impose their beliefs or wants onto you. Maybe you need to put you first? So many HSP’s are the over giver, wounded healer, victim, martyr, or rescuer.
Why Highly Sensitive Coaches Struggle Financially In Their Business
One of the biggest challenges many highly sensitive coaches, therapists and healers have is they have all sorts of struggles with financial abundance. They can have all sorts of challenges in their business and their life because of this. I know being a self-employed highly sensitive empath, coach and healer for over 18 years.
Main Motivation Of The Highly Sensitive Coach
The highly sensitive person or empaths driving motivation can appear in many ways to be related to the top of maslows hierachy needs instead of the bottom. The highly sensitive coach is often not driven by the same money goals that most other coaches are. Their client, work and financial relationship is often far more complex.
What I witnessed as both a coach/trainer and client to many coaches and therapists. In-fact even as a client to many coaches and healers over a 25 year period. Was that many of the most gifted and qualified coaches/ therapists were highly empathic and HSP. They were also are the most likley to under charge in comparison to some of the most awful coaches and healers who charged premium prices.
So let’s look more deeply at why the HSP Coach tends to struggle with financial abundance
The Success Struggles Of The Highly Sensitive Coach
Highly Sensitive Coaches are motivated by self-actualization in many ways this takes dominance. They are very much more focused on the spiritual self.
Highly Empathic Coaches can be so aware or entangled up with other’s pain they just want to be of service, they forget they are actually running a business.
The Highly Sensitive And Empathic Coach is often more dominated by their altruistic traits so not driven by money or financial success.
The Highly Sensitive Coach often resists the business, marketing and technical aspect of their business. Many Empathic or HSP Coaches fear the business and marketing part of the business. This can cause them great distress and anxiety.
How You Can Start Healing Your Money And Abundance Struggles
Traditional based Meditation Techniques and grounding strategies including spending time in nature help support and heal the root chakra. It is important you address root level challenges, conditioning, and beliefs that need to be addressed.
Be More Open To Receiving
Often life’s over givers, carers, healers, therapists and empathic coaches come from such a place of lack of over-giving, they have forgotten how to receive. Don’t get caught up in how the universe gives/provides, trust, and be open to receiving the help and support in whatever shape it comes. Focus on gratitude daily this will increase your vibration.
Heal Your Wounds
If you are highly empathic or highly sensitive and affected deeply by other people’s energy. Heal your own wounds, heal your own issues. Being aware of other’s pain and taking others’ pain are two very different things. Many coaches and healers can go into this type of work because of their own life challenges which are still being healed. This can take time but it is vital you address them.
Own your uniqueness, your spark of wonder, your specific gifts you are here to share with your clients. So many highly sensitive coaches doubt their own abilities, stop focusing on what everyone else is offering or charging, do your own thing. Stop giving your energy and power away.
Face Your Fears
Face and address your own sabotaging fears or sabotaging patterns of behaviour. There is no point focusing on a law of attraction mindset if you are trying to suppress or deny what needs to be addressed. What we vibrate we attract is not all or just about mindset that is a misconception.
Own Your Coaching Business
Start owning you are a business service, address any issues you have around this. At least 90% of the coaches and therapists I work with the struggle for many years because they view themself as for example lightworkers who are helping people so they shouldn’t need to advertise. Sadly so many of them rarely show up and never survive, stuck in the sand believing they are doing such great work that everyone should find them. If you charge you are in business.
When you get connected with spirit, god, and your essence. You live each day from a bigger sense of confidence, calm, and trust. You get out of your fearful sabotaging head and into a state of being. And how can you do that, well with the right type of meditation. The type of meditation or technique that helps you access that sense of presence, stillness, and inner wisdom at almost the switch of a button. When we can bring in a state of peace, stillness, and connectedness to our moment to moment life. Our fearful sabotaging mind starts to fall away.
Do you have the ability to trust and surrender, to let go and let god?
The ability to let go of control in difficult situations?
Or do you have that constant need to control or fix everything?
Why True Empowerment Involves An Element Of Letting Go
You know one of the things I learned along my own journey is that to become truly empowered we need to let go and let god. It took me a long time to realise this and like most of us, I have to be reminded. The ego fools us into believing that we must do this, need to that as if we are supposed to control everything. As if the world, the universe is this terrible place that doesn’t provide, nurture, or support us.
Most of us hold deeply ingrained beliefs that imply we are the only ones who can and must make it all happen. And that you have to do this or that to be enough or to be this worthy person. These perceptions completely separate us from universal laws and god.
It’s sad how much-distorted perceptions we all carry from ancestral, cultural, religious, and society’s conditioning. And how these conscious and unconscious distortions can shape or destroy our life. What we believe or don’t believe about ourselves can create a great illusion and delusion lol.
How To Let Go And Let God Be The Caretaker
Some of the biggest distorted perceptions many empaths and highly sensitive people hold is that their role is to constantly support, fix, heal, or put others’ needs first. This is evident in the way you may absorb and or interact with other people’s energy or pain. It is so easy to over-identify with the healer or carer role on an unconscious and conscious level. When we believe we have to or should control or fix every situation. When the reality is so far from the truth.
We all have areas of life where we think we try to control situations. Maybe it’s your family, your relationship, your colleagues or staff, career, someone’s health, and wellbeing…
We soon learn when it’s much wiser to let go and let god, let things unfold, let god be the caretaker of the situation.
Top Tips To Let Go And Let God
STOP And Check In With Yourself; Notice when you are in a constant state of fear, resistance when you want to control everything?
Cultivate A Sense Of Trust; when you learn how to trust there is a bigger picture, bigger plan it is much easier to let go when it is the right or healthier thing to do. You will also get a deeper sense of when it is appropriate to take action.
Acceptance In The Present Moment; when you learn how to practice acceptance of each present moment, you learn how to surrender in that specific moment. Please understand acceptance does not mean you are lying down or giving up on a situation. You are just surrendering to that moment, to make room for God to come in and either give you guidance for action or guidance for patience.
The Power Of Letting Go And Letting God
I spent a large part of my twenties housebound and at times bedbound. Oh how hard I tried to get better, a woman on a mission to fix, overcome, and try to control, every aspect of my health.
I meditated at least 20 minutes twice a day
I visualized myself healing every morning and the night going to bed.
I even followed a no sugar, no gluten, no dairy diet for many years.
I spend many thousands of pounds on so many forms of healing therapies.
I got all sorts of tests and nutritional support
But you know what the biggest healing breakthroughs were only when I started to let go and just be. Because the harder I tried to heal myself the more symptoms and further problems I created. I began to realise that fighting against dis-ease is not always the best way to heal. In many ways your fighting with your body.
The Distress Of Denial And Resistance
I remember one particular day I was so frustrated my body wouldn’t do what I wanted it to do. I had been training to be a singer before I got really ill, and was fighting so hard to get back to doing what I loved. And it just wasn’t happening I could hardly walk never mind anything else.
My mum I think saw my frustration and said to me “Be still and know that I am god”. In a way, these were not the words I wanted to hear but something made me STOP.
When I look back it breaks my heart in some ways I was trying so so hard to fix, heal, myself. I was carrying so much shame that I wasn’t better, I wasn’t healed. I was a trained healer, I had studied so much, tried so much and I still wasn’t fixed. I felt so much guilt that there was something wrong or bad about me. I just wanted to live that normal life like my friends, my siblings, I suppose there was an element of why me? But the main problem I was unconsciously fighting, resisting, trying to survive never mind thrive.
The Healing Power As You Let Go And Let God
And the truth was, IT WAS only those times when I let go and let god. Those times when I stopped trying so hard and gave up that need to control. I started to get stronger and stronger. Because I wasn’t resisting what my body was trying to tell me
Now I have to say I was a bit impatient in my healing journey and it wasn’t plain sailing after that. Because it takes tremendous courage to truly surrender. I did get some of my health back but I was just so desperate to get some of my life back. The only way I knew how was to became self-employed. Despite still needing to sleep/rest up to 14 hours a day just to function, serious mobility, and stamina issues. I just wanted to feel valued, feel worthy, have a purpose, and not depend on the lowest of state benefits.
In many ways, my business gave me so much, it was highly empowering. But underneath like most of us, I hadn’t healed within, where it truly mattered. That place where all disease, unhappiness, addictions, stress, and anxiety resides. Like most of us, I wanted a role, an identity to mold myself into and control. Anything but this distorted perception of myself as a disabled weak fragile woman with no value. But despite being a stress therapist, I attracted very extreme business challenges. And had an unhealthy need to fight for my businesses at almost any cost because I over-identified with it.
In many ways, my business was my baby, my relationship, and a replacement for all those things I also loved that I could no longer do.
When Your Forced To STOP, Let Go And Let God Into Your Life
It was often only when I was forced to STOP. That I had to let go and let god that I was reminded how powerful letting go is. And believe me, you would have thought I would have learned. I have received so many huge signs, particularly around my health; threatened eye loss, suspected cancer scares, surviving life-threatening sepsis and so much more. I seem to be a slow learner or very very stubborn lol.
You know, when we let go and let god and just be, it is not just deeply healing or spiritual. But it can be life-transforming and magical. In these moments, so much shifted in my life in such a deeper and profound way. We don’t have to do it all alone, we don’t have to live our lives in a specific way. We are supported, we are being guided, but are we listening, or maybe more importantly are we trusting?
What Is Your Soul’s Essence And How Do You Nurture It?
I believe our Soul’s Essence is our purest essence, who we are at a core level. Not the stories we tell ourself or who the world tell us we are. But that aspect of us that naturally shines through when we are allowed to be free to be our self.
When we remove the distracting material things of this world, we get to the coure of one’s soul. Our soul’s essence is that mixture of beautiful gifts and traits we are here to share in the world. But sadly most of us have such a distorted perception of ourself and our purpose. We often can’t see or recognise our soul’s essence never mind shine our soul’s essence.
Why Don’t I Recognise My Soul’s Essence?
If you are a highly sensitive person or empath who is highly intuitive, psychic or clairvoyant in any way. You maybe have been traumatised into believing your unique soul’s essence is weak, bad, evil, scarey, stressful or even exhuasting from childhood. Because often highly sensitive children are often viewed as weak, vulnerable, over dramatic, immature, dysfunctional by those around them. And often grow up believing this about themself. Never mind a highly psychic sensitive child who is often viewed as crazy, mentally unwell, weird, having a vivid imagination or simply dishonest.
Parents and siblings of a HSP can struggle to understand their highly sensitives traits and gifts. This fear or negativity around the HSP’s soul essence can trigger a lot of conflict not just around the empath or HSP but within them. And as we know inner conflict is one of the biggest ways we all disempower ourself and create dis-ease or dis-harmony within the psyche. So in many ways we try to dampen down or cut off that connection to our unique essence because of our own fear.
I know how much I feared my own psychic and intuitive gifts in my life particulary as a teenager. Although I naturally used many of my empathic and intuitive gifts in my healing and therapeutic work. I was terrified of my some of the psychic gifts I appeared to have from young age especially when I was brought up in a religion that viewed many of these abilities as wrong. This can be hugely disempowering and disabling. But thankfully I have started to recognise how much they are just part of my unique soul’s essence, part of what I am here to do.
But even if you are not a HSP or empath most people struggle to recognise their soul’s essence because of most people today are so disconnected with their true self. They are so caught up with material and egoic distractions of the noisey mind they are not tapping into what is already there.
How Can I Build A Strong Connection With My Soul’s Essence?
Meditate: One of the most simplest ways you can start build a more natural connection with your Soul’s Essence is through meditation. Paticularly more traditional style meditations than guided meditations especially to begin with. Because this initially helps us loosen our attachment to the ego to our over dependence on the rational or logic mind. If you are a HSP or empath who has spent most of their life in conflict with their psychic and intuitive gifts and sensitivites, your inner conflict will always want to depend on the rational logic mind. Traditional based meditation techniques helps you spend time quite time in the stillness with the self, your self. So you naturally build up a much more stronger connection without expectation or without your imagination getting too carried away which can sometimes happen in guided meditations.
Get Grounded:The highly sensitive person often struggles to make a strong trustworthy connection with the soul and their inner compass because they are so ungrounded. Empaths particularly are deeply affected by the energy, the emotions and world around them. So it is important that you ground regularly, as you can read in Why Highly Sensitive People Need To Ground More As you will learn grounding doesn’t have to be all new age happy hippie stuff.
Patience: I believe one of the biggest mistakes many students make when they are trying to build up a bigger connection to their soul’s essence, souls’ purpose, intuitive or psychic gifts. Is impatience because they want to run before they can walk. They go to meditation or a psychic class just seeking answers, guidance, increased abilities. Instead of simply nurturing a relationship with the self or their soul’s essence first. So they do not build up a strong foundation or strong connection, rather a shoddy one that is based on only what they can seem to get on a superficial egoic way. I will give you an example, I began studying Reiki 26 years ago and things have changed so dramatically in so many ways. Even the word Reiki Master/ Teacher now is a very loose term because most teachers today certainly haven’t spend decades mastering their reiki practise on a day to day basis. In-fact today many go on to Master/Teacher level in a few years with often very few clients experiences under their belt. And often attracts students who simply want to be more psychic or just looking for a certificate in some sort of type of holistic fast track training. Very few people are willing to truly master anything, they are too busy looking at the next distraction or next external thing to feed the ego.
Positive Intention: With a positive intention in life you create a much more positive vibration in your energy field. That does not mean you do not deny what emotions want to come up and flow out for healing. Emotions are simple energy in motion,we just need to allow them to flow but the biggest challenge most of us have is we either want to deny or block the feeling out of fear. Or we focus on the story we believe triggered the emotion. And we ruminate that story over and over in our head. Positive Intention opens you up to allowing magic, synchronicities, spiritual guidance into your life. It is one of the reasons I prefer intentions rather than goals, goals can be too linear specific and egoic. They don’t allow room for all the magical possibilies around us we couldn’t possibly imagine could happen.
Trust: Like every thing in life a strong connection with a strong foundation is only built up over time, with integrity, authenticity and trust. You have to build up trust with your soul’s essence. And believe me if you take the time to do it right, your connection will become so much more powerful and unshakeable.
When you meditate, get grounded, send out a more positive intent with patience and trust you are less likely to waste so much time and energy running around in circles with your ego. Distracting yourself with all sorts of things, ideas, courses or things that never fulfill your passion, purpose or inner being. You are more open to and likely to start naturally flowing with life’s synchronicities, life’s magic.
Learn the essential skills every empath an hsp need’s that will help you nurure a deeper connection with your Soul’s Essence? Start to truly know how to love and care for you, become more empowered with your soul’s greatest gifts.
How The Highly Sensitive Person Can Reduce Stress Levels On A Daily Basis
The Highly Sensitive Person is so much more sensitive to external and internal stimuli they need to be more pro-active to reduce stress levels. Anxiety and stress is high in our western busy and over stimulated way of life. But that doesn’t mean just because you are a highly sensitive person or highly empathic that you need to suffer from chronic anxiety or chronic stress.
Chronic stress is triggered by our fears, it is our reaction to the world around us, the way we psychologically and physiologically respond to situations, people and the things around us. The biggest cause of stress today is our mental thoughts; our conditioning, what we attach and give power to.
But external stimuli such as environmental noise, information over load can certainly play its part so can environmental and internal toxins. But the way we view the world, situations, very much represents how we show up in the world. If you are a HSP, a highly sensitive person who views the world as a highly harsh, uncaring and dangerous place. You will show up in the world as a very fearful, highly anxious, sensitive soul. Who struggles to survive never mind find their wayin the world.
The highly sensitive person or highly empathic person has tremendous gifts to share with the world. They have tremendous compassion and huge insight about those around them. Because they are highly intuitive and highly sensitive to the energy and emotions of the people and situations around them. But this also makes them more vulnerable to other’s anxiety and stress, to mass consciousness and to many other thing’s that most people can comprehend.
Some famous people who have been regarded as a HSP a highly sensitive person include Albert Einstein, Carl Jung, Diana- The Princess Of Wales, Judy Garlan, Mother Theresa. You can learn more about a highly sensitive person’s traits here.
5 Simple Ways A HSP- A Highly Sensitive Person Can Reduce Stress Daily
Assertiveness- learn how to say NO, one of the biggest challenges many HSP’s and particular empaths have a challenge with. Is the ability to say NO. Empaths feels others pain and fears so deeply the often struggle to identify their own needs. So struggle to set healthy boundaries.
Be Yourself – trying to fit in, comparing yourself to other’s, judging yourself on other’s ideas of what you should and shouldn’t be like. Is a huge source of distress. You are more than enough, even in within your vulnerability, your physical, emotional and even mental sensitivity, you are enough. You are unique, special, wonderful and here to be you.
Grounded – become more grounded physically, mentally and emotionally get out of your head and get connected to your body and the earth around and underneath you. I find the essential oil blend On Guard a great aid. When you are more grounded your energetic field is much stronger so you are naturally more boundaried from other people’s negativity and emotions.
Be In The Moment– learn how to be more present, more in the moment, take each step, each day as it comes, let go of the yesterday’s and tomorrow’s, see below as meditation and mindfulness can help. You tend to be more grounded and find it easier to naturally assert your own needs when you live in the moment.
Unplug- a highly sensitive person or highly empathic person usually needs to unplug and switch off more frequently than other’s do. HSP’s tend to have sensory processing issues which affects the autonomic nervous system. So the slightest over stimulation can trigger the “fight or flight” stress reponse. Leaving the HSP highly wired, anxious, stressed and exhausted.
Cushioning – is a stress management strategy that helps cushion you from the impact of a stressor or stressors. It involves using any practical, therapeutic or strategical strategy that will help you reduce stress and become more resilient to the stressors of every day life. It can involve taking action, managing or reducing the stressor in question but also includes an aspect of balance into your life. It involves havinga . more healthier aproach to your every day life, so you are generally more stress resilient. I have extreme noise sensitivity which is excaberated by medical challenges so I use ear plugs when required. I plan out all activities, visitors and over stimulation with plenty of quiet time. For many sensitives this is a key part of remaining healthy, calm, confident and strong.
No matter how long you have suffered chronic anxiety or chronic stress due to your hypersenitivity. You don’t just have to live with it, your life as a HSP doesn’t have to be stressful. I was a highly anxious, stressed out teenager, who suffered chronic unworthiness, who tried to relentlessly to deny and resist my empathic traits and highly sensitivite traits. I started to suffer extreme health challenges including burn-out from the age of 19. And spent a large part of my twenties extremely ill, exhausted and isolated. Out of this experience I became a meditation teacher, healer, coach and stress management expert. I have helped many people including many highly sensitive people and highly sensitive children move from a highly anxious state of being to a more calm confident way of being.
I realise how challenging life may feel at the moment. But believe me your life as a highly sensitive person can be far richer, peaceful, lighter and FREE.
Eileen is a highly experienced coach, healer and meditation teacher who has studied healing and holistic well-being for over 28 years .
Owner of Stress Coach Training , Eileen is an anxiety and stress management expert who offers online training courses for coaches and therapists. Online Certificated Relaxation Therapist & Teacher Training, Stress Management 101, Meditation Courses, Empaths Tools Kit and Spiritual Marketing Courses For Coaches & Healers
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