What does following your own truth actually mean? And why can owning your truth be hard at times especially when you are highly empathic or sensitive.
Living Your Truth
Well to live your truth is about living a life full of authenticity and openness. To me it is also one that is guided by spiritual guidance. But why do so many of us live most of our lives trying to live up to other people’s expectations or definitions of truth.
As a highly sensitive empath I was a big people pleaser who struggled to own my truth. I have spent most of my life enmeshed in other peoples emotions I struggled to know my own. I’ve struggled to own and express my truth because of a distorted perception that owning my truth would hurt someone else
Following Your Own Truth
For me following your truth has to start by recognising and owning what is true to you, no one else. From infanthood, we are exposed to other people’s beliefs, conditioning, values, but that doesn’t mean they are our truth. Other people’s perception of truth is based on their beliefs, personal experiences, and what feels true for them.
Every single one of us is uniquely different from our own unique soul’s essence. That essence is part of a bigger picture, the jigsaw of life. And to do that in the healthiest authentic way we need to be able to follow what is true in our heart. In many ways I mean to follow our spiritual truth, not our egoic truth. So it is about getting out of our head, our fear, and into the heart and soul.
Identifying Your Truth When Your Highly Empathic
We are all exposed to other people’s beliefs and ideologies on a daily basis. But at a core level your soul craves the need to follow your own path. Your spirit wants to live a life that is based on your integral values, your inner compass.
One thing I was taught early on from my father was to trust my intuition. But to be honest being a bit of an unruly empath my energy can easily be dominated by much stronger personalities or their views. Like many empaths I am very easily entangled by the emotional pain and needs of others. So I have to identify, own and step into my truth, know what is is my energy and what is not.
Moving Into What Is True For You
Believe me moving into your own truth isn’t easy if you have strong characters or strong views around you. But finding your truth is so important when trying to live a more healthy authentic life. If you don’t it is too easy to be living everyone else’s truth rather than your own.
Why It Is Easy To Lose Your Truth
So many people struggle to know their truth never mind follow their truth. It’s easy to lose yourself, lose your truth, your voice in relationships, within family dynamics or at work. In jobs and careers where you have to live by other people’s policies, rules, core ethics, and values it is easy to lose or forget your truth. Many work environment actually encourage suppression of truth and core values so much so you barely recognise yourself
This is especially true for those of you who are highly empathic with unhealthy boundaries. But believe me I know if you don’t get behind your truth, your inner guidance, you lose you. It can lead to anxiety, stress become you have moved out of alignment with yourself.
Of course, on a spiritual level, everyone’s truth is just a story, just a perception. But to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves and to have direction we need to know ourselves. We need to know what feels right and fits with our values and what doesn’t. Suppressing or denying what feels true for you, can lead to all sorts of internal chaos, confusion even dis-ease. So start owning your truth today.
How To Start Owning What is True To You
When you start owning your truth it can be very freeing, expressing it can bring up very strong fear. Learning how to express that truth in a clear and concise way can take time especially if you struggle with assertiveness. Building more clear and honest communication between you and others can take a lot of courage, self-compassion and patience.
Top Tips To Start Owning And Expressing Your Truth
How to stop giving your power away especially when you are highly empathic or highly sensitive? We are so enmeshed in other people’s needs, other people’s pain, and emotional needs. We constantly feed them instead of ourselves, we become the victim.
Stop Giving Your Power Away To Your Loved One’s
It is so easy to hand over our power to your loved ones, your partner, your family, your friends, even colleagues without realising it. We do this by allowing others to control, manipulate, or push us into choices that are not ours and even worse not in our best interest. These situations will often exhaust us, deplete us, diminish, and can even devalue our sense of self, self-worth, and self-esteem.
So many of us give our power away to our fears, distorted beliefs our addictions. We constantly dis-empower, dis-honour, and dis-respect ourselves on a daily basis.
Why? Because we have a very distorted perception of ourselves and the world around us. So we end up creating life-long unhealthy patterns that sabotage our health and happiness on a daily basis. Ironically one of the biggest forms of dis-empowerment is the way we give control over our health to other people.
Are You Giving Your Power Away To Your Doctor Or Therapist?
We often assume that those who help support us with our health and wellbeing, even our spirituality have our best interests at heart. But every time you hand over decisions of your body, mind, emotions, and or spirit to another person without checking in if this feels right for you, you may well opening yourself up to an element of dis-empowerment.
Look at the culture in the west of how much we expect our Dr to heal, fix, or treat health conditions or symptoms caused by unhealthy lifestyle choices. Another example of giving your power away and not taking responsibility for our own wellbeing. We live in a world wherein many ways we are conditioned to give our power and decision-making away to someone else, that is not only disempowering but potentially damaging on so many levels.
Are You Giving Your Power Away To Psychics, Mediums, Or Horoscope Predictions?
Or too much power over to a Coach, Healer, or Spiritual Teacher?
Stop, take time to get centered, and aware of where you are handing your power or leaking energy?
As healers, we are here to help, sometimes guide or teach you. But you should never give your power away or over to us. We are here to help empower you, we are here to help hold a space of healing, even challenge, question and yes sometimes trigger you? In-fact in some ways, we are not here to be liked even though we are here to do right by you.
But sadly there can be a misuse of power and harmful practice in coaching, healing, and spiritual teaching. Harmful practice in the holistic therapy industry nearly cost me my eye and another cost me serious liver toxicity. I was young, naive, vulnerable, and trusted the wrong therapists.
Unfortunately today we live in a society where are at our core we feel we are not enough. This feeling of lack of not enough triggers a deep need in many people to have more, be more to such an extent they will do almost anything to get more.
This lack will even try to destroy or dis-empower others in their struggle to appear more special, more spiritual, more awakened, more successful.
Look at the generation we are living in, one where you can literally buy anything at the press of a button. One of the most concerning is the ability to get a certificate or diploma in something in over a few days to a few weeks in something that would previously take a year or two.
Every day individuals are naively giving their power and lots of hard-earned cash away to anyone or anyone who promises them something faster, easier; instant transformation, instant success.
So it is important than ever to become more mindful of your daily interactions.
It is so important to start listening to your inner guidance your own intuition, your own spiritual connection.
Is That Situation Or Person Enabling You Or Disabling You?
We are all human and we are all evolving but it is important to recognise when we are not being supported or empowered when we are being disempowered or controlled.
Being a highly sensitive empath for as long as I can remember. I only began to take a lot of my power back after a spiritual experience in intensive care where I was fighting for my life. And a few years later where I saw a visual energetic imprint of all these people’s opinions about the cause of my rare medical challenges. In many ways, it was so enlightening as I could see over 45 years’ worth of different medical professionals’ opinions, different healers, therapists, even family members, and friends’ opinions. A lot of other people’s beliefs that didn’t belong to me but which on some level I had taken into my energetic field.
Like so many people, so many empaths I didn’t recognise how much of my power I was giving away. I was a full-time people pleaser who gave my power away daily and didn’t even recognise it.
10 Ways To STOP Giving Your Power Away?
You get more grounded and centered. When you are more earthed, stable, and in your own body and energetic field. You are less likely to be dominated or manipulated by others’ energy or opinions. This is extremely important for empaths and sensitives who struggle with energetic boundaries.
Learn to meditate, make meditation an important daily practice. Meditation helps’ you connect with your inner wisdom and recognise what is right for you.
Stop making assumptions about other areas of skills, expertise, or wisdom. Just because they appear to be, suggest or even state never means they actually are. Learn the art of discernment. We often give our power away by simply assuming someone has more expertise, knowledge, and wisdom in a particular area. Do your homework
Take self-responsibility for your actions and in-actions, heal your inner child wounds. Don’t rely on others to fix, heal, sort, or solve situations. Yes, we all need a little bit of help at times. But if you need to learn a particular skill, need help to be for example to be more assertive, more confident in doing so. Do not expect others to do this for you.
Do not be scared to ask specific questions if you are unsure about a situation. For example, ask a Dr or therapist why they suggest or think this is the best form of therapy. Do not be shy about finding out more about someone’s level of expertise, testimonials of any claims made.
Be clear in your communication, what you need, what you believe, how you feel.
Don’t let someone rush you into a decision you are unsure about. It is okay to say I am unsure about this, I need time to think about it.
Set healthy boundaries as part of your daily routine and your mindset. Especially when you are highly empathic or sensitive, more anxious, stressed, or vulnerable.
Be mindful of unhealthy emotional traits, unhealthy thinking patterns. Where in your life are you an over pleaser, over giver, have unfound guilt, the wounded healer…?
Heal your inner child– heal those old distorted belief’s that entrap you into the people pleaser, the over giver, the over nurturer. Heal and teach the child who never learned about boundaries, who never learned to self-care.
As Marianne Williamson states in A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles” –
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”
Why Empaths Struggle With Self-Care, Struggle With Self-Love, And Setting Healthy Boundaries?
Why do so many empaths struggle with overwhelm, exhaustion, and burn-out because so many empaths tend to over give and attract life’s over takers? Sadly empaths are also more likely to attract those with quite strong narcissistic traits.
Empaths often struggle to say NO, finding it difficult to create and maintain healthy boundaries which can lead to all sorts of life, work, and business challenges.
You see, like most people, empaths struggle with self-love but empaths also have huge issues around self-care. With their strong tendencies towards over-caring, over-giving, putting other’s needs before their own that they are more likely to suffer from exhaustion, stress, and burnout. Especially when so many of you have strong archetypal traits of the martyr, fixer, healer, nurturer, rescuer.
Why Empaths Struggle With Over Giving?
Empaths struggle with over-giving and caring because most empaths are in some way energetically aware and often immersed in the energy, pain, and drama of the people and things around them. An empath will often find it difficult to differentiate their own needs, their own energy field from the energy field, and the emotions of others.
Empaths often need lots of time out, empaths are so sensitive to the energy and people around them they need lots of time out.
Empaths are often highly sensitive so are more sensitive to energy; not just people but their surroundings, places, items, the world, animals…
A highly empathic person will be highly intuitive and psychic. These important skills help keep the empath and highly sensitive empath healthy and happy. The empathic child will often bring these gifts through very clearly but if those around don’t understand and support the child’s gifts, the child will often feel confused, ashamed and fearful which often leaves to an emotional and or energetic shut-down.
Empaths can be very misunderstood like HSP’s they can be categorised as too weak, too sensitive, strange, or weird because of their heightened awareness of the un-known, the un-seen.
Empaths very easily lose their identity in relationships so can often avoid close or intimate relationship to protect themselves. They can find it extremely challenging to deal with controlling relationships, parents, work colleagues.
A lot of empaths are introverted but for those with more extroverted tendencies, it is often important for them to spend time alone or resting.
Many empaths end up with burn-out or other types of chronic health challenges due to poor management of their gifts. Especially lack of boundaries, over-attachment to being the carer, supporter, helper, healer, nurturer. Most wounded healers are empaths.
Many empaths don’t just feel and absorb people’s emotional pain but physical pain.
Become More Grounded – Learn how to get fully centered, grounded, and in their body. Spend more time in nature, away from the biz. Unplug more from EMF’S and technology
Be More In The Moment – Start to take one step, one moment at a time, be less in the future, the past, or in the what if’s. Don’t let the monkey mind run or ruin your world.
Meditate – Start meditating daily. Meditation helps you not only be in the moment, be more grounded and centered but it increases self-awareness. It will help you become more of a witness when you are giving your energy or power away to others. Join my Online Meditation Class.
Heal Your Inner Child– Inner child work is a powerful way to heal incidents in your life’s timeline where you took on unhealthy thought patterns, trauma, suppressed emotion that is causing blockages in your health and wellbeing.
Are you ready to turn your empathic gifts into your biggest strength?
One of the biggest challenges many empaths have is they can often feel energetically that everyone wants a piece of them. And as Dr. Elaine Aaron and Dr. Northrup suggests there is a lot more people who think they are empaths than they actually are. You may have empathic traits but that doesn’t mean you are an empath. So many many people struggle to understand the unique challenges empaths face.
Especially if you are the type of empath who automatically wants to help fix, heal, nurture, care, or support anyone who you think needs it. Because unconsciously you absorb their pain while they feed off and deplete your energy. This can be an unhealthy cycle many empaths struggle to break. Because consciously never mind unconsciously empaths are so used to being of service. They are so compassionate being in-tune with other people’s pain, so used to absorbing all sorts of energy around them. That saying no and having boundaries can feel as if it goes against your core essence.
The Empaths Need To Learn How To Say NO
As an empath and/or sensitive you have to be able to say no, you need to learn how to have really really strong boundaries. You have to be energetically aware when others are trying to push their agenda and needs onto you. At a cost to you. You are the only person who knows what you can give to others healthily and what you can’t, something I still work on. And yes for most empaths boundaries is not something that comes easily.
Why Empaths Attract The Needy, The Narcissists
So many empaths attract the needy, the narcissists, and the energy vampires. If we are not fully in our body or mindful don’t it is easy not to recognise when we are being sucked dry energetically by another person until after the event. So many of us have spent most of our life enmeshed in other people’s drama, energy, and pain that we genuinely don’t recognise our own needs or feelings in the situation.
So energetic and boundary awareness is something we seriously need to work on. Anyone who struggles with energetic boundaries can also be more easily swayed by other people’s ideas, thoughts because of the dis-entanglement of energetic thought patterns.
If you were discouraged from standing up for your own needs as a child or were silenced in some way. Lack of assertiveness and boundaries has to be addressed alongside a deep recognition that your needs are as important as others. Inner Child work can really help with this challenge because these beliefs and conditioning were formed in childhood.
As a highly sensitive caring empath for as long as I can remember. I attracted many people and situations in my personal and business life that didn’t serve me. Why? Because I am a natural over giver, someone who for most of my life has been an energetic sponge.
When Everyone Wants A Piece Of You At Work
On one hand, it can extremely positive when you have skills and gifts people feel they want or need. But only when your gifts are being equally valued, when you are receiving what you need in exchange for those gifts. And when you can actually balance your time and energy efficiently in a healthy and balanced way.
But so many empaths in businesses not only undervalue their worth but because they come from a place of service, their business can get easily get confused by the structure and model of a charity rather than a business. Often letting their empathic nature get in the way of vital business decisions. Empaths too easily attract the freebie seekers, the energy exchangers, even the manipulators.
Most people would be very surprised or may be shocked by how many emails and Facebook messages I get from people in a week expecting something for free. Now in many ways I love to help I am one of life’s nurturers and over givers. But I live on my own, I am self-employed part-time and have rare and chronic health challenges that impact my daily living and work great. So that comes with even more challenges. I get far easily depleted than most of the people around me. And can take far less clients than other coaches and therapists, I know.
I need to remind myself daily that I need to be served to serve, something that Kyle Gray talks about. When everyone wants a piece of you for free, in-fact expects a piece of you for free, that is something that has to be addressed. And something like you I need to address no matter how challenging it can be.
If you have been a people pleaser most of your life, it can be harder to say NO than the person asking will ever realise.
Now I have run quite a few free Facebook groups in the past but I closed them down because I was inundated by so many personal messages from people who assumed I should give my time, energy, wisdom, and even courses for free. Despite already offering a wide range of resources for free blogs, podcasts, free self-study, and live courses. And what was even more surprising was from a group who were supposed to be empaths and highly sensitive people.
Empaths Tips – What You Can Do
Develop Self Awareness – when we develop more awareness of the self and our energy we can become more detached from the drama and projections of others. We are less likely to be triggered by our empathic vulnerabilities. One of the easiest ways to do that is to learn effective meditation techniques. Check out my 5 Minute Meditation a powerful meditation tool
Know Your Needs Are Your Priority – it is vital you work on recognising you are just as important as those around you. You need to be able to take care of your needs before you help anyone else.
Step Back Energetically – consciously step away from their energy. If you have to imagine you are removing that person from your energy field or unhooking them, do so. Most people have no awareness they are hooking in on or taking from someone energetically. They are just like everyone else on the planet unconsciously trying to get a need filled.
Take Time Out – take plenty of time to unplug from everything especially others’ energy fields. So you energetically get back into your own body. Even moving yourself to another room or outside, space from the situation for a few minutes can help.
Don’t Over Think It – don’t allow the ruminating mind to take over. Oh, I should be helping them…it’s a shame…
Don’t Take On Their Manipulation – don’t allow someone else’s victimhood or manipulation to hook you into their mess. This is simply a subtle form of control, that people use to get what they want out of a situation.
Access Your Own Inner Wisdom – allow your own inner guidance to make the right decisions again don’t let others sway your decisions. As a very highly sensitive empath and intuitive who has worked with energy for over 25 years. I often have a deep sense of knowing or feel others’ energetic motives which others are unaware of. When I allow others views to cloud my own guidance it usually doesn’t serve me.
Heal Your Inner Child– heal the childhood experiences that have had you believe you have to fix, nurture, care, support, heal others. Heal the inner child that struggles or doesn’t know how to set energetic boundaries
Why Every HSP Highly Sensitive Person Should Learn How To Meditate. Why meditation helps the Highly Sensitive Person or Empath become more mentally and emotionally resilient in their life and business.
Daily Challenges Of The HSP Highly Sensitive Person
I believe everyone should learn how to meditate but if you are an empath or HSP I believe meditation is a must. Why? Because if you are an HSP you are more sensitive to the energy and stress of modern-day living. The HSP has a highly sensitive sensory system, basically a more finely tuned nervous system than most people. This gives the HSP a lot more awareness and receptivity to the world around them. But this also makes HSP’s less resilient in some ways more easily overstimulated.
Reasons Why The HSP Highly Sensitive People Should Meditate
The highly sensitive person is often more easily wounded. The HSP Empath is often more scattered in their energy. In many ways, they are often not fully in their energetic body. That is why many highly sensitive empaths are often ungrounded and uncentred. Why so many highly sensitive’s and empaths struggle mentally, physically, and or emotionally in their day-to-day life.
Highly Sensitive Empaths are like energy sponges. So they need to need to learn how to become more centered, grounded, and energetically aware. Meditation naturally helps increase awareness and presence. Meditation can also help us become more grounded and centered.
Why Every HSP Should Meditate Daily
Daily Meditation is so good for your mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing
Regular meditative practice is known to lower anxiety and stress levels.
It helps you access a deep space of stillness and peace, so meditation often increases clarity and confidence
We know meditation helps you access much clearer intuition and inner guidance.
Meditation allows you to heal mentally, physically, and emotionally
My Own Meditation Journey As A HSP And Empath
I began meditating over 28 years ago, I tried, tested, and studied various styles and teachings of meditation. As someone with very rare medical challenges that mainstream medicine couldn’t treat, I had to find skills that would make me more physically, mentally, and emotionally resilient. Oh, how I thank god that I found meditation. This was a skill that helped me become so mentally resilient. Meditation helped me deal with so many tremendous and long-term challenges with strength and peace.
One of my earliest teachings of meditation was to a class of rather troublesome young men. I knew teaching meditation to a class of rather rowdy you men might not be a walk in the park. So I went searching for a style of meditation that might accommodate their particular needs. I found a technique that I adapted in which became My 5 Minute Meditation. In-fact this became the most popular meditation tool I ever taught. Loved by not just teenagers, but stressed-out executives, carers, healers, highly sensitive people, and empaths.
Finding The Right Type Of Meditation To Start With
When you find the right type of meditation tool for you, you will build your meditation practice up much stronger. If you have a very busy, demanding lifestyle the 5 Minute Meditation is a great starter tool. But I would still encourage you to practice a more traditional style of meditation into your routine. This form of meditation will help you transcend into living more of your life from a place of meditation.
The problem today is there is a lot of myths and misunderstanding around meditation. Many people give up too quickly on their meditation practice because of a misunderstanding of what meditating actually is.
Beginners Meditation Technique For The Anxious HSP
If you are an HSP who struggles with chronic anxiety and stress I would encourage you to try out a very short style of meditation like my less than 5 Minute Meditation which is great for beginners. This particular technique is really useful for chronic anxiety and even trauma sufferers, so it’s much more gentle than other forms of meditation.
The Right Type Of Meditation Teacher If You Are Highly Sensitive
My advice would be to choose a meditation teacher wisely, find out more about them, years of experience, training, and styles of meditation they teach. If you’re an Empath or HSP you may want to book a one-to-one session with a meditation teacher before attending a class or start with some simple meditation at home. Also, check-in that the meditation teacher actually teaches you how to meditate they are not just practicing or guiding you through guided meditations more like guided visualisations, this is often something very different.
Why Meditation Supports The HSP
Anxiety and emotional wounding is a big problem for the HSP, Meditation helps loosen those challenges as it helps us detach from that wounding. When we meditate we connect with the self, an aspect of us that never changes. This helps nurture a healthy anchor, a stronger connection with where magic and stillness transcends everything else.
Eileen is a highly experienced coach, healer and meditation teacher who has studied healing and holistic well-being for over 28 years .
Owner of Stress Coach Training , Eileen is an anxiety and stress management expert who offers online training courses for coaches and therapists. Online Certificated Relaxation Therapist & Teacher Training, Stress Management 101, Meditation Courses, Empaths Tools Kit and Spiritual Marketing Courses For Coaches & Healers