Ylang Ylang Oil To Help Soothe Your Inner Child. Why Ylang Ylang oil is one of the essential oils commonly used to gently soothe, relax and support your nervous system from inner child trauma when used alongside inner child healing and therapy.
Ylang Ylang Oil (Yi Lan Yi Lan)
Botanical Name:Cananga odorata
Ylang Ylang Oil is extracted from the Ylang Ylang Tree also known as Cananga odorata, a yellow star- shaped flower of tropical descent native to beautiful Asian areas around the Indian Ocean such as the Philippines, India, Malaysia. The ylang ylang flower only blooms at night, it has a bright floral scent.
Ylang Ylang Oil Benefits
Ylang Ylang Oil has deeply spiritual properties as well as healing and nurturing properties. When used correctly the oil of ylang ylang acts as a soothing balm when consciously working our inner child wounding and trauma. Especially ylang ylang extracted from the yellow flower as it has soothing properties on the nervous system.
In traditional medicine especially ayurvedic and traditional Chinese medicine ylang ylang has been widely used to help treat various ailments such as
Ylang Ylang is also used in beverages, ice cream and sweets.
Choosing The Right Grade Of Ylang Ylang Oil
To get the optimum healing properties of any essential oil it is important to choose a high grade quality essential oil. I have tried many different essential oil brands over the last 30 years NYR Organics Ylang Ylang Oil and Doterra Ylang are my favourites in relation to quality of grade.
NYR Organics tend to be lower priced and are UK’s first certified organic health and beauty brand, I LOVE that NYR are a brand of high integrity and the safe and effective use of essential oils is clear in their products and marketing.
Doterra don’t seem to be as clear on safety and effectiveness, and all I am going to say I have personally witnessed too many skin burns and other toxicity issues due to in correct advice and use by some of their ambassadors.
Is a natural anti-depressant, soothes the inner child wounding.
Can aid sleep, alleviate nightmares and nigh traumas.
I have personally found Ylang Ylang extremely soothing and healing during the deepest challenges of my life. It helped me to completely eliminate nightmares while chronically and seriously ill in my early twenties.
Aromatherapy Bath is one of the most effective ways to use ylang ylang oil, next best way to use ylang ylang for your inner child is an aromatherapy massage, a massage that applies a ylang ylang oil blend with a carrier oil to the whole body or parts of the body; for example chest, tummy, back, arms, legs, feet.
The aromatherapist carefully blends a selection of oils with a carrier oil, also known as a massage oil to suit your individual needs. But note blending oils is an art, a
An aromatherapy bath
The best way to add any essential oils to the bath is to add the oils to a base oil that will easily disperse in the bath such as avocado, coconut oil, olive oil.
Then add 5 ml of your ylang ylang oil or add 5 drops of Pure Essential Oils to bathwater. You can include another essential oil in the 5 drops to be more grounding add 4 drops ylang ylang and 1 drop of Frankincense or Sandalwood. To be more uplifting choose 1 drop of orange or Mandarin, Jasmine or Rose Essential Oil.
Ylang Ylang blends well with Frankincense, Geranium, Jasmine, Lemon, Mandarin, Rose, Sandalwood, Vetiver.
Then thoroughly disperse in water before entering the bathwater.
Relax in the bath for a minimum of 10-15 minutes to get the full benefit.
Essential Oil Cautions and Contraindications
Most people underestimate the power, properties, and potency of essential oils. Even though essential oils are extracts of nature every essential oil is uniquely made up of different volatile compounds.Each essential oil tends to have a long list of therapeutic properties but some have potentially toxic and harmful properties when not used in the right dilution or not in a safe and effective way.
Use essential oils with care, especially when applying essential oil blends on children, the elderly, those with certain health challenges or medical conditions. Always check with your doctor and a qualified aromatherapist to see if essential oils are suitable for any chronic or rare medical condition.
What is shadow work and why is shadow work such an important part of self healing, raising your vibration and consciousness.
What is Shadow Work?
Shadow work is about healing our shadow traits, our inner wounding, our fears, mental and emotional triggers, unhealthy beliefs, actions and programming. Every single one of us have positive traits and shadow traits, that impact how we show up in our life. The roles we play, even the circumstances we attract in our life.
Shadow work is an important part of raising our vibration and level of consciousness. It requires a certain amount of self-awareness, self-inquiry and self-responsibility and it is an ongoing process. It is not something you just do over a period of time and all is healed, shadow work is a fundamental part of the spiritual journey.
As they say its’s a journey not a race.
There is all different types of shadow work and in many ways different layers to shadow work. One common aspect of shadow work is healing the inner child and this is normally done along side other archetypal shadow work. Where one explores the most dominant archetypal patterns that are playing out in their personality and behaviours.
We just need to explore the Wounded Healer a strong archetype in healers, therapists and many medical professionals.
The Wounded Healer
The Wounded Healer has both light and shadow traits.
In it’s highest positive light traits the wounded healer, is able to support someone’s healing process through compassion and healing from their own wounding.
“In 1951, Jung first used the term wounded healer.11 Jung believed that disease of the soul could be the best possible form of training for a healer. In a book published days before his death,12 Jung wrote that only a wounded physician could heal effectively” National Library Of Medicine – The wounded healer
In its shadow traits the ego wants to heal others than working on their own healing. The Shadow traits can show up in all sorts of way in the wounded healer. Especially in healers who wants to heal others than constantly working on their own mental, emotional, physical and spiritual healing. Healing is an ongoing process.
A healers unhealed wounding can also show up in healers who move from training to training, certificate to certificate just for the title or to add something to their business., but don’t apply the tools and techniques to their own life. Or healers and coaches who only look at light work and positive mindset and use all sorts of avoidance techniques to avoid the shadow within and around them.
Healing Our Shadow Traits
Shadow work, healing our shadow traits is an ongoing process, in a 3d world we all carry different wounding that is keeping us stuck.
Anything that triggers a negative emotional reaction is a wounding; a persons words, actions, beliefs.
Any behaviour pattern that is not of the highest vibration is a shadow trait; from the things we do or don’t put in our body and mind, what we do and don’t do in our life.
That is why things like avoidance, procrastination are shadow traits. Even over attachment to materialistic things are shadow traits as it means your ego is running the show and putting more importance to material things than your soul.The need to be right, even certain expectations are shadow traits.
There is also so many different types of shadow selves like the naive shadow, superficial shadow, cowardly shadow, suspicious shadow, controlling shadow…
5 Ways To Heal Our Shadow Traits
5 different types of shadow work that helps heal our negative traits
The Art Of Stillness
The art of being still and being able to be in the moment is a powerful part of healing our shadow wounding as it all starts with self awareness. When we struggle to be still, struggle to stop or meditate, in many ways something else is running the show. Childhood trauma or conditioning can create all sorts of unhealthy beliefs or programming around busyness, or fear of facing the shadow within. That is why deep traditional meditation practices are extremely powerful at increasing self awareness and better soul connection.
Building a deep heart and soul connection helps us naturally get more connected and guided with our soul’s essence. It helps us loosen our attachment to things outside ourselves that is not of the light our divine truth. Soul work naturally helps expand our vibration and helps heal our wounding and triggers, the biggest cause of unhappiness.
It also helps elevate our consciousness and awareness to such a degree that you are not as easily influenced or programmed by the illusion and deception of the 3rd world.Equally you also become less polarised, that is why so many lightworkers who have good soul connection and good soul power can see through the veil of illusion and chaos and still stay very positive and grounded.They can look at the dark and not be as touched by, while others want to hide, because they are hiding from their own shadow.
Inner Child Healing and Inner Child Therapy
There are so many different types of inner child work that can help us explore and heal hidden and deep seated emotional triggers and unhealthy shadow traits that are keeping is stuck in patterns. Inner child play is good for beginners, it is helps form a more calm and relaxed connection with the inner child. There are a variety of psychological and healing approaches to inner child and shadow work.
I use some psychic approaches because of the amount of energetic and psychic interferences and attachments people are carrying, especially healers. For inner child work, make sure you choose a therapist who has a good understanding of trauma, the psyche and schisms.
Archetypal Therapy and Healing
Archetypes are a powerful way to highlight both positive and shadow traits in every area of our life. Technically inner child work is one aspect of archetypal work, though archetypal work outside just the realm of the inner child but all different archetypal patterns that are playing out.
I have been studying archetypal work for over 25 years and even though there is so many layers to archetypal work I find it extremely powerful to help healers, therapists and coaches and any sort of lightworkers, move through their self-sabotaging shadow traits.
Therapeutic Story Telling
Creative and therapeutic storytelling can be a powerful way to heal inner child trauma and wounding. It can be extremely healing and empowering. One of the most fun, creative and healing sessions I ever run many years ago was a Fairytale Inner Child Writing Course. Healing and changing our story our narrative about how we see ourselves is a powerful way to move out of the sabotaging survival archetypes we take on. That is why therapeutic storytelling can be used alongside other types of shadow work.
The Art Of Self-Compassion And Compassion. Why compassion for ourselves and others is so important, especially during this time of awakening and ascension?
How to find self-compassion for ourselves and others without suffering from compassion fatigue?
What Is Compassion?
Compassion is the strong emotional feelings we have in relation to another person’s pain and human suffering, whether that be emotional, mental, physical, or spiritual pain.
What Is Self-Compassion?
Self-compassion is having the same level of compassion and positive regard for ourselves that we have for other people. Some say it is a form of goodwill towards ourselves as it involves helpful thoughts, kindness, and a deep caring for oneself.
Why Is Self-Compassion So Challenging?
But why is self-compassion such a struggle for so many people, especially empaths and those in the caring professions, who show so much compassion for others on a daily basis?
Like everything in life, there are many reasons we can struggle with self-compassion, as much as we can also suffer compassion fatigue.
Common challenges with self-compassion are often linked to an inability to look at our own trauma, our own pain, distorted beliefs, and unhealthy patterns.
This can lead to unhealthy expectations of self and others, which can cause a lot of inner conflict, that leaves us believing that we all need, must, or should be super perfect, superhuman, be there more for others than ourselves.
Which can lead to all sorts of problems such as burn out, illness, resentment and compassion fatigue.
There is a general view that a lack of self-compassion stems from poor self-worth and self-esteem. Though, according to Professor Kristin Neff, 5 Myths Of Self Compassion one of the biggest problems is actually an over-emphasis on self-esteem.
She has a very valid point, in relation to the personal development and coaching industry which often implies self-esteem, as something you achieve through striving, and goal-setting, in relation to building self-confidence.
When one over-identifies with the human self, the egoic self rather than our soul essence and god spark we are more likely to suffer from human burnout and compassion fatigue. Which is so prevalent in the health and caring industry.
Signs Of Compassion Fatigue
Compassion fatigue can show up in all sorts of ways, here are some common symptoms of compassion fatigue
Loosen Our Over Identity With The Human Experience: One of the wisest things we can do is to learn how to loosen our over-identification with the human experience. And nurture a deeper connection with our spiritual self. Every single one of us has human challenges, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities to face. It is easy for us to judge ourselves or others harshly when we over-identify with the human aspect instead of the soul. When we can find the wisdom to view human conditioning from a more spiritual or awakened perspective the easier it is to bring in objectivity and more compassion to ourselves and others
Develop An Open Heart: An open heart moves us out of judgment and self-judgment. It helps us move out of polarity, out of I am right, you are wrong. I am weak your strong or vice versa. It moves out of any competition or needs to be anything or anyone, into the ability to radiate true love including ourselves.
Deepen Your Soul Connection: A good soul connection starts with a good heart connection, it helps us be guided by our soul of what is right for us and what is not.
Identify Your Main Shadow Archetypes: Identifying the main shadow archetypes that are withholding compassion can help reveal a lot about our triggers. For example, if we see the Martyr, Rescuer, Judge, Ruler, Victim, or other archetypes at play, we can see what distorted narratives and patterns need to be balanced. While doing shadow work it is important to do be more self compassionate towards ourselves and others.
Heal Your Inner Child: Healing your inner child trauma with deep self-compassion and spiritual maturity helps us heal unhealthy distortions of how we must, should, or need to be. It also helps us heal certain expectations we put on others. Other than actively getting the right help and support to heal our inner childhood wounding. There are a variety of natural essences and essential oils that can support us Ylang Ylang Oil is a useful essential oil that helps soothe and comfort the inner child.
Become More Present: The more present we can become in our own lives, the more mindful, aware, and present we become to our mental and emotional triggers. The easier it is to start minimizing and eliminating unhealthy reactions and behavioral patterns that keep us in an unhealthy loop.
Practice Patience: Like everything self-compassion and self-love takes time to master. We are all doing the best we can, with the level of consciousness we are at. We all have different types of vulnerabilities and weaknesses, some can be easier than others to work through. It is important to be patient and be…
Be Kind To Yourself: Showing kindness to ourselves is so underrated, in a time when truth is becoming so important it can be easy to forget that there still needs to be a place of kindness, especially self-kindness.
7 Signs You Are Being Gaslighted In Therapy Or Healing
What is gaslighting? And what are some of the most common signs of being gaslighted in therapy, healing or coaching? How to deal with a therapist, healer or even coach that is gaslighting you.
What is Gaslighting?
Gaslighting is basically a manipulative tactic one person uses to gain control or power over someone else by basically seeding doubt in someone else’s mind of their own reality. By trying to instil confusion over the person’s own memories, beliefs and sanity.
Gaslighting is a form of control and in many ways psychological abuse and although narcissistic gaslighting is a widely recognised behaviour pattern adopted by narcissists.
Most of us experience some form of gaslighting in our life at some time, especially in situations where we are vulnerable and there is an imbalance of power.
That is why sadly gaslighting at work and in the patient-to-doctor and client-to-therapist relationship is so common. It is not always caused by deliberate abuse or even recognised but it is something I see evidence of in a big way every single day.
We can all get caught up in it gaslighting in subtle ways even though it can be extremely damaging even traumatising to the individual’s psyche, self-confidence and self-esteem.
Gaslighted By The Medical And Healing Profession
I spent years being gaslighted by the medical profession and health practitioners, who didn’t believe the medical challenges I was dealing with.
Mainly due to their own lack of awareness, insight and experience.
It taught me valuable lessons about how well the wounded healer within us all can mean well but can also cause harm to the clients we are supposed to help heal and empower.
And made me question so much around the potential harm around so much fast-track training in the therapy, healing and coaching sector. Especially when I met so many people including clients who were gaslighted by the people that they were supposed to protect them.
Psychological abuse that would have me questioning my own sanity, nearly cost me my eye, my life and the loss of tens of thousands of pounds in the wrong types of therapy and healing.
It highlighted how much a little bit of knowledge and the need to be right or in control can be dangerous even in the most well-meaning individual.
And how much our own personal agenda, our own personal bias and beliefs as a therapist can seriously thwart, harm or sabotage another person’s healing process and self-empowerment.
A more recent visit to a chiropractor highlighted the cost of this problem. After revealing extreme trauma and misalignment to my spine, shoulder, head and body (4 inches of misalignment in very key areas of my body) that went in many ways undiagnosed and untreated for so long that it had caused even more complications. Because of such a push by others what I was experiencing was more psychological when it was physiological.
Sadly this is becoming a huge problem in some forms of healing and therapy, where too many healers lacking expertise, knowledge and awareness are gaslighting their clients’ reality into such an unhealthy degree that many clients are questioning their reality or feel too ashamed, guilty to seek they help they really need.
Gaslighting In The Workplace
Gaslighting in the workplace is one of the most psychologically abusive forms of control in the workplace. It can lead to extreme mental and emotional challenges for the victim or victims. It is something that is not always easy to address, especially when a well-seasoned narcissist knows how to play the victim and the environment well..
Gaslighting In Today’s Society
Sadly gaslighting by people in government and power has never been as strong in the West and worldwide as we have seen over the last few years. This alongside horrendous censorship has created a mass amount of manipulation and abuse of power. This can leave the people questioning their reality, in a state of confusion and disempowerment, a place where the abusers want their victims to be so they can control them even further.
7 Common Signs Of Being Gaslighted In Therapy
Signs of gaslighting in therapy, healing, counselling and coaching.
The therapist or healer ignites doubt, and confusion or even tries to trivialise or twist your reality about a situation. This is very common when your reality does not fit someone else’s belief system or agenda. Now of course in certain types of therapy, it is the therapist’s job to help you renavigate distorted thinking. But there is a fine line between twisting someone’s reality and helping them create healthier thinking patterns.
Constantly Tears You Down:
They will tear you down, then try to build you back up, tear you down, build you back up in a way that creates energetic chaos and instability. It feels very unsafe and in many ways is extremely ungrounding and even traumatizing.
Ignite Shame And Guilt:
Often an abusive therapist will take advantage by deliberately igniting shame, and guilt in their client as a way to gain power or control over the client in the session. Or even blame them for their mistakes or ignorance, shifting responsibility for their harmful actions or ignorance onto the client.
Actions Don’t Reflect Words:
They will tell you they are here to help you or support you but their actions imply the exact opposite when you are being gaslighted in therapy, counselling or coaching.
Attempt To Control Your Decisions:
Another way gaslighting can show up is when a healer, therapist or coach tries to control your decisions. They will try to exert power, and control over the decisions you make in your life, relationships, health or business. This is also seen in health professionals or therapists who believe they are the answer to all of your problems and encourage co-dependency issues.
Create Co-Dependency Issues:
Gaslighting often has a huge impact on the victim’s self-esteem and self-confidence this and the constant questioning of their reality and sanity leads them to be more vulnerable to mental and emotional instability and co-dependency issues in the client-to-therapist or professional relationship.
Sadly a very common form of gaslighting in the medical and healing profession today is misdiagnosing someone as crazy or that someone’s symptoms are all in their head rather than in their physical reality. We see this a lot in newer healers, therapists and health professionals who have a little bit of knowledge, think they know it all and as we say don’t know what they don’t know. It often comes from lack of experience, knowledge and lack of awareness.
How To Deal With Being Gaslighted
How to deal with gaslighting in a therapy, healing or coaching session.
Recognise You Are Being Gaslighted:
It is so important to know when you are being gaslighted, awareness is key. When people talk about gaslighting they often just think about gaslighting in an abusive relationship. But gaslighting happens in different facets of life.
There is a very fine line between a therapist or healer who deliberately manipulates, bullies, gaslights or even coerces you to diminish your power and ability to decide what is right for you. Or one who is just naive and unaware but sadly both can be damaging.
Stand In Your Truth:
Stand in your truth, when being gaslighted. Don’t let someone try to manipulate your experiences. Although some types of therapy and healing are there to help us expand or way of thinking, to help us see our reality is a perception and what we have attracted and manifested into our life.
Don’t let any spiritual or wellbeing professional try to doubt or diminish your personal truth, your experiences. because of their inability to handle, deal or listen to your truth. If you are experiencing serious abuse of power don’t be scared to call them out.
Remember They Haven’t Walked In Your Shoes:
Remember that person has not walked or lived in your shoes, they are only seeing a tiny snap shot of your life from their own lens. That lens could be crystal clear or it could be very distorted. We have to be open to our own blind spots and know we all have our own way of seeing the world, which may or not be truth. But therapists can also have a certain bias, it is why therapists of psychology often see their clients mostly through their psychological perceptions, why many inner child therapists tend see their clients challenges through the eyes of mental and emotional trauma from childhood. And why many bodyworkers mostly view their clients challenges through the world of physiological stress, trauma or unhealthy posture.
Listen To Your Own Soul:
The clearer your connection to your heart, soul and god connection, the easier it is to become resilient to other people’s distortions, projections and energetic interferences. This come from not just a good soul connection but good soul power.
The problem is if you are really energetically sensitive and highly empathic, you are also more open to other people’s wounding and trauma in the collective and this is where it can get energetically confusing,
So in the process of your own healing it is so important to choose not just the right therapist or healer but one with the right skillset and tools for your specific needs that will help honour your soul’s path.
Healing From Being Constantly Gaslighted
One of my biggest lessons has been the importance of choosing the right therapist or healer for me. Learning to ask the right questions and look for key signs that someone may or may not have the expertise or level of awareness or consciousness I need or want.
This includes investing in healers and therapists who are not just about getting the certificates but actually do the inner work.
One of the reasons I now personally choose to mostly invest in therapists, healers and wellness practitioners who have been in the field a long time, highly conscious and awake lightworkers who are highly invested in their own healing journey and spiritual growth. Awake enough to know what is going on in the world.
None of us are perfect, we are all learning, growing and expanding in consciousness and awareness and it is important you choose a therapist or healer that aligns with you.
The last thing you need in the process of trying to heal from gaslighting trauma from a therapist is to face further gaslighting from another healer or therapist or work with a therapist or healer who is not self-aware enough to support you in the best way.
End Any Therapist Agreement That Isn’t Working
Don’t be shy or scared about ending any agreement with a healer or therapist where you feel it is just not working. I know personally I have spent thousands of pounds on healing and therapy that wasn’t the right fit. At times I went to healers and therapists for years just because I felt coerced or obliged.
Avoid working with any therapist or healer who tries to manipulate you into working with them or believes you should be going to them because you know them. This is extremely unprofessional and unethical and in many cases, it can be better to go to someone you don’t know on a personal level.
Self Compassion And Self-Forgiveness
Be kind and compassionate towards yourself, therapy and healing is a process, we all have wounds and challenges that we need help and support with at times for so many reasons. When we are vulnerable and seeking help or answers we don’t always make the wisest choices.
Bring in self-compassion and self-forgiveness and of course forgiveness for the other who is only functioning from their level of consciousness or awareness at that point.
And remember like all forms of healing, take one day at a time, be open to miracles but be patient with yourself when that healing takes a little longer than you hoped or planned.
No matter how healthy, caring and nurturing our childhood was, we all have inner child wounds, we all have happy, self-sabotaging and destructive patterns that impact our life, health, relationships and what we manifest in our life.
Nurturing Your Inner Child
Nurturing your inner child is an important part of helping to comfort, reassure and soothe our inner child to become a more happy healthy adult.
But like everything in life there is a healthy way to nurture and approach your inner child and a not so healthy way.
It is that fine balance of being able to really listen and acknowledge the inner child while equally parenting the inner child in a nurturing way.
Like every your child, your inner child can want and crave all sorts of unhealthy patterns in an attempt to self soothe it’s trauma, neglect, abuse and loss.
And this is why it is so important to approach healing your inner child and nurturing your inner child in a healthy balanced and informed way.
10 Ways To Nurture Your Inner Child
Connect With Your Inner Child –
You cannot truly and effectively nurture your the child within until you can make a really healthy and deep soul connection with your inner child. This is a step that shouldn’t be rushed and it requires you to set times in your day, week where you make that conscious connection.
Many children of certain generations were seen but not heard. And in many ways not seen.
The ability to really listen to what our child archetypes and inner child is trying to tell us is of vital importance. Because if e don’t listen closely enough we can miss very important information, that is why listening to your inner child is so important and one of the most fundamental basics of inner child therapy.
Being Fully Present With Your Inner Child –
The ability to be fully present, requires the ability to be still, be quiet, be fully in the moment is so important. If you struggle to be still, struggle to connect within or to your soul’s essence. You are going to struggle to connect with the heart of your child archetypes that need your attention. That is why the right meditation techniques and soul connection skills can be extremely helpful.
Honour Your Inner Child –
it is so important for us all to respect, value and honour our inner child and all our archetypal traits in a balanced and healthy way. Just like honouring, respecting and valuing a child we love, we have to honour that child in a way without reinforcing unhealthy child wound patterns.
This is why honouring and valuing the child archetypes within us also involves parenting our inner child to recognise unhealthy stuck patterns. For example the shadow traits of the eternal child that doesn’t want to grow up and chooses to continue play out the child role in life to avoid growing up and taking self-responsibility, the victim child who chooses to be a victim of their circumstances, who doesn’t value, honour or respect themself enough to create change.
Soothe Your Inner Child –
Healthy self soothing is an important aspect of nurturing our inner child, the key is healthy self soothing. Unhealthy patterns of self soothing is eating a full tub of ice cream or any other form of unhealthy comfort eating or relying on drugs or prescription medication to self soothe. It involves having deep self compassion for one’s self.
Instead self soothe using relaxation techniques, havening, a relaxing bath, calming and grounding essential oils anything that will help calm down the nervous system in a healthy balanced way.
Play With Your Inner Child –
As adults we forget to have fun, we forget to make some playtime in our day, in our week, our life. It is so important to have fun, laughter, to take time out. The entertainer, jester archetype can help remind us of these qualities.
Get Creative With Your Inner Child –
Creativity can be a powerful therapeutic tool in inner child work, the right type of creativity that feels aligned with your soul can be very soothing and nurturing. Tapping into the artist, creator archetype or the creative child archetype or magical child archetype can help inspire that creativity.
Exploring different creative hobbies can be extremely healing and can help reignite more passion and creativity into our life.
Send A Letter To And From Our Inner Child –
Sending a deeply caring and loving letter to and from our inner child can be extremely healing and cathartic. Sending a letter to your inner child to tell your child that you love and care for them can help open deeper doors to self healing. Sending a letter from the wounded child to the adult you stating what you really need right now can really help you identify what your wounded child really needs and wants at a deeper soul level.
Parent The Inner Child –
Parenting our inner child is a vital part of the healing process, if we cannot parent our inner child we cannot help the child grow up in a healthy and balanced way. A healthy parent helps teach our inner child healthy patterns that help us become a healthy happy grown up.
Unhealthy parenting teaches in an unconscious way unhealthy patterns, self sabotaging and destructive patterns in our life. So part of parenting your inner child is teaching your inner child a new way of being
Healing Our Inner Child –
The right Inner Child Healing can be extremely powerful at helping you make massive shifts in your life, your relationships, your business and career.
So it is important to choose the right type of inner child therapist, or an inner child healer or inner child work that will best suit your inner child needs. Choose an inner child therapist that understand trauma, self sabotaging patterns and your most dominant archetypal traits that are running or ruining your life.
I have personally met and worked with so many clients through the years that have felt more damaged or traumatised by therapists or healers that don’t really know what they are doing.
Listening to what our inner child really needs than just wants is crucial. And don’t be shy about asking the therapist about their qualifications, level and area of expertise in inner child work; years of experience and how many clients they have worked with. It is important our inner child feels safe and is safe with a therapist, counsellor, coach or healer.
If you are ready to help soothe, nurture and heal your inner child to that happy healthy child and adult you deserves and is meant to be check out my new lightworkers portal, where you can access a variety of inner child meditations, inner child courses and spiritual self development tools and techniques and so much more.
Sample some of my Free Inner Child And Archetypal Resources in the Lightworkers Library.
Understanding The 12 Main Archetypes In Therapy, Healing and Business. What are Archetypes? And what benefits can come from understanding your main archetypal traits in your life, relationships and work?
Understanding Archetypes is extremely useful in certain types of therapy and healing when approached in the right way. I began studying Archetypes over 25 years ago. I would go on to study Archetypes from the psychological and psychotherapy perspective, the spiritual and healing perspective, and then Archetypal Branding and Marketing.
Archetypes go hand in hand with Inner Child Healing and can be extremely helpful in helping us identify more clearly our personal strengths and our weaknesses.
To understand Archetypes it is helpful to look at the work and views of Swiss Psychiatrist and Psychoanalyst Carl Jung. Specifically his Jung Archetypes and the Jungian Concept of the Psyche. Carl believed that we all have human inclinations and/or traits that we in many ways are born with. What he regarded as heritable psychic structures that play a part in how we experience and show up in life.
When he used the word the Psyche he viewed the Psyche as the all-encompassing aspects of one’s thoughts, emotions, feelings, and behaviour. While many today would describe the psyche as just the mind.
According to Jung, he viewed the psyche as 3 Major Realms
Consciousness – Awareness which he regarded as the ego; the memories, thoughts and emotions you are aware of.
Personal Consciousness – a layer where we hold events that we are not consciously aware of It is where we hold events we have perhaps ignored, denied or discarded.
Collective Consciousness – the realm that holds in many ways a whole collection of Universal Traits; shared attitudes, beliefs, ideas, and wisdom that relate to individuals and large groups of individuals.
Through clinical patient and historical research, Jung discovered that many individuals no matter their cultural, society, religious status or beliefs, held commonly shared unconscious traits. From this understanding and research the concept of Archetypes was introduced.
The 4 Major Jungian Archetypes
This would eventually lead to Jung suggesting there were a variety of different archetypes, which included the Child, Mother, Father, Hero, Trickster, Wise Old Man…He explained that different archetypes were not fixed but in-fact interchangeable with other archetypes. That is why what is regarded as the 12 Main Archetype’s can look very different in certain types of work.
What Are The 12 Main Archetypes?
Today the work of Archetypes has evolved from Jung’s Main Archetypes. Like for example Psychometric Analysis, Archetype analysis is used to assess certain traits; attitudes, beliefs, behaviour, strengths and weakness for therapy, healing, job placement, education, branding, and marketing.
The 12 Main Archetypes
The use of Archetypes has become a bit of a trend. So Jung Archetypes in many ways have been adapted and modernised to suit modern times but for the purpose of this blog in relation to therapy and healing I have chosen below
The light aspect of the Caregiver, the Nurturer Archetype is an individual whose traits are mainly selfless, their strongest traits in life are empathy, compassion, and giving. They naturally want to nurture and protect those they meet. They are often very strong empaths and lightworkers.
Common shadow aspects of the Caregiver is their tendency to protect and give unconditionally without thinking. Victim, Martydom, Rescuer Traits. This often lead to over-giving, lack of boundaries, difficulties saying no. Which can lead to being undervalued, taken advantage of, exhaustion, burnout, frustration, resentment.
The Creative Archetype’s most positive traits include the natural flair and ability to dream, create, be original. They have a tremendous gift of imagination, innovation and self-expression
The Artist or Creative Archetype’s shadow trait include their perfectionism, strong traits of neuroticism, or tendency to put creativity over positive solutions. Overthinking and emotional instability can lead to relationship difficulties, introversion.
The light aspects of the Innocent are their optimism, positivity, their ability to see good in everyone and their desire for everyone to like them. They tend to believe the world is a great place to live. They long innocence, rebirth and in many ways salvation.
The shadow aspect of the innocent is their naivety, innocence, dreamlike view of the world and others mean they can lack judgment and discernment. They are one of the easiest archetypes to impress but are fearful of being punished for doing wrong.
The light aspect of the Explorer Archetype is their sense of adventure and freedom seeking. The enjoy seeking and exploring new places, new experiences, they have a strong tendency towards personal freedom and space.
The shadow aspects of the Explorer Archetype include the restlessness or dis-ease that comes with being bored or feeling you are in the one place or doing the same thing for too long. Their lack of fear or lack of boundaries for new adventures, new places can lead to challenges around commitment, focus, persistence, rules and boundaries. It can also be a major cause of unhealthy forms of escapism like drugs, alcohol, adrenaline junkie.
Positive aspects of the Hero Archetype include the depth of courage, energy and power they have to achieve something they believe is the honourable thing to do. They are about making the world a better place, defending the rights of others. They can often see the bigger picture in relation to governments, organisations and society.
Shadow aspects of the Hero Archetype can be a strong need for power and limelight. Their tremendous level of ambition that can get work against them or others. Doing almost anything including stepping over others or sacrificing them self to achieve that goal. Can be viewed negatively as Conspiracy Theorists although they tend to have a wider view than others on what is actually going on.
The Magician and Alchemist Archetype’s most positive and light traits include the ability to be a catalyst for transformation and growth. They tend to have a much stronger and deeper connection to the universe and unseen than many other archetypes do. So tend to have strong intuitive and or psychic traits. I tend to attract a lot of Alchemists in my work as many are natural healers, spiritual teachers and transformational coaches.
The Magician’s shadow traits include being easily seduced my magic, money and illusion. They don’t always have patience and like the Magician Apprentice want to get the results without always doing the work or practice. This alongside having very strong opinions can make them sometimes the challenging student. Or cause them to not reach their full potential or fall for their own illusion. They can as quickly destruct or self-destruct as transform and make great change.
The Lover or Romantic Archetype main light traits are feminine, love, emotions, passion, sensitivity, devotion and commitment. This archetype is easily suppressed by strict or rigid parenting.
The Romantic or Lover Archetype’s shadow traits include their deep fear of rejection, their need for someone else, their need to please. Lack of Self-Love and Self-Care. Can have a strong tendency towards co-dependency issues, over-attachment, and neuroticism. Suppression of the Lover Archetype can lead to all sorts of addictions and promiscuity.
Jester Archetype’s main positive traits are their strong ability to have fun, be the life and soul of the party. They have a natural ability to uplift others and get others to join in and engage in activities or communication. Tend to be entertaining and or a natural comedian. Their main motto tends to be you only live once.
Common Jester Archetype shadow traits include not always taking things seriously, because they fear being judged as boring. They often have challenges around being mature, sensible and taking self-responsibility. Their darkest shadow elements include deception, lies and manipulation. The reason the Jester is viewed as both positive fun and as the Trickster devious and deceptive is because their polar opposite tendencies. The Jester can therefore be fooled by their own mind, believe anything is possible, not see their own limits or limits within a situation.
Orphan Archetype also known as the Communitarian, Realist, Everyday Girl Or Everyday Man
Realist Archetype’s main positive traits include their strong abilities of equality, they are normally highly sociable and are particularly relatable to the man on the street. Think the boy or girl next door.
Realist’s shadow traits include their fear of being the odd person out, excluded, so they can easily themself and their values just to be part of the group, the community.
Rebel Archetype also known as the Outlaw Archetype
Rebel Archetype’s main light traits is their Free Spirit, their ability to expand and break perceived limitations, and level of independence.
Rebel’s main shadow traits include their fear, frustration with rules and boundaries, think of the Rebel without a clue or Rebel without a cause. In the negative state they can have a tendency to go against the grain or rules just for the sake of it. This can lead to a lot of self-destructive or self-sabotaging patterns in life, relationships, work and business.
Ruler Archetype also known as the Leader, Father, Royalty or Sovereign Archetype
Ruler Archetype’s main positive attributes include their natural ability to be a leader, to lead than to be led. They tend to be an authoritarian figure, that has courage, strength and a broad view of a situation.
Shadow traits of the Ruler Archetype include repressed anger, the need to dominate some sort of control or power over others. And their inability to see what they are suppressing than leading or motivating. Their struggle to trust others and to delegate. And insatiable thirst for material success or status, difficulty asking for help or admitting when wrong.
A Sage’s positive attributes include their strong thirst for deep wisdom, truth and knowledge. They tend to live a life full of introspection and introversion. The tend to philosophy their life’s journey as a series of lessons and insights. The sage in some ways is the more mature, knowledgeable and wiser Magician.
Common Sage shadow traits include they can be the never ending student, always learning, but never taking any action or use their knowledge for any common good. Often a life that is analysed than lives. Can struggle to be fully in the moment.
Introduction To The 12 Main Archetypes
Now this is just an introduction to understanding the 12 Main Archetypes. Archetypal healing goes a lot wider and deeper. When applied in the right way it can be a powerful tool in Inner Child Therapy, in Healing and in certain types of Spiritual Coaching and Mentoring.
The reality is there are so many different archetypes that are in the collective unconscious. So many than can be used and explored to support us in different ways. But the most important one for you is identifying your strongest main archetype. That main archetype that shows up in you in the way you live your life every single day.
Understanding Yourself Through The 12 Main Archetypes
I believe the more we understand our main archetypes, the more we can understand ourselves. It can also be extremely helpful in identifying your strengths and those things you need to work on. I also use Archetypes as a tool to help healers, coaches and Spiritual Teachers build a business around their strengths rather than their weaknesses. Archetypal Branding to help capture the energy and emotion of their business and them in their marketing.
If you would love to explore archetypes and inner child work, check out the Gold or Quantum Level of my Spiritual Marketing Club Membership where you can access a library of archetype courses and archetypal sessions including a variety of inner child therapy and healing sessions.