Why Empaths Struggle With Self-Care And Self-Love

Why Empaths Struggle With Self-Care And Self-Love

Why Empaths Struggle With Self-Care, Struggle With Self-Love, And Setting  Healthy Boundaries? 
Why do so many empaths struggle with overwhelm, exhaustion, and burn-out because so many empaths tend to over give and attract life’s over takers? Sadly empaths are also more likely to attract those with quite strong narcissistic traits.
Empaths often struggle to say NO, finding it difficult to create and maintain healthy boundaries which can lead to all sorts of life, work, and business challenges.
You see, like most people, empaths struggle with self-love but empaths also have huge issues around self-care. With their strong tendencies towards over-caring, over-giving, putting other’s needs before their own that they are more likely to suffer from exhaustion, stress, and burnout. Especially when so many of you have strong archetypal traits of the martyr, fixer, healer, nurturer, rescuer.

Why Do Empaths Struggle With Self-Love And Self-Care - Eileen Burns, Stress Therapist and

Why Empaths Struggle With Over Giving?

Empaths struggle with over-giving and caring because most empaths are in some way energetically aware and often immersed in the energy, pain, and drama of the people and things around them. An empath will often find it difficult to differentiate their own needs, their own energy field from the energy field, and the emotions of others.

Common Empathic Traits

An empath will be very aware of other people’s emotions and needs in-fact they will often absorb another person’s feelings and or pain

Empaths often need lots of time out, empaths are so sensitive to the energy and people around them they need lots of time out.

Empaths are often highly sensitive so are more sensitive to energy; not just people but their surroundings, places, items, the world, animals…

A highly empathic person will be highly intuitive and psychic. These important skills help keep the empath and highly sensitive empath healthy and happy. The empathic child will often bring these gifts through very clearly but if those around don’t understand and support the child’s gifts, the child will often feel confused, ashamed and fearful which often leaves to an emotional and or energetic shut-down.

Empaths can be very misunderstood like HSP’s they can be categorised as too weak, too sensitive, strange, or weird because of their heightened awareness of the un-known, the un-seen.

Empaths very easily lose their identity in relationships so can often avoid close or intimate relationship to protect themselves. They can find it extremely challenging to deal with controlling relationships, parents, work colleagues.

A lot of empaths are introverted but for those with more extroverted tendencies, it is often important for them to spend time alone or resting.

Many empaths end up with burn-out or other types of chronic health challenges due to poor management of their gifts. Especially lack of boundaries, over-attachment to being the carer, supporter, helper, healer, nurturer. Most wounded healers are empaths.

Many empaths don’t just feel and absorb people’s emotional pain but physical pain.

Take the Empathic Test – Score if you are highly empathic or definitely an empath

How To Heal The Empaths Struggle

Become More Grounded  – Learn how to get fully centered, grounded, and in their body. Spend more time in nature, away from the biz.  Unplug more from EMF’S and technology

Be More In The Moment –  Start to take one step, one moment at a time,  be less in the future, the past, or in the what if’s. Don’t let the monkey mind run or ruin your world.

Meditate –  Start meditating daily. Meditation helps you not only be in the moment, be more grounded and centered but it increases self-awareness. It will help you become more of a witness when you are giving your energy or power away to others. Join my Online Meditation Class.

Heal Your Inner Child Inner child work is a powerful way to heal incidents in your life’s timeline where you took on unhealthy thought patterns, trauma, suppressed emotion that is causing blockages in your health and wellbeing.

Are you ready to turn your empathic gifts into your biggest strength?

Are you ready to heal your empathic imbalances from your Inner Child?

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How To Reduce Stress As A Highly Sensitive Person

How To Reduce Stress As A Highly Sensitive Person

How Can You Reduce Reduce Stress As A Highly Sensitive Person

The Highly Sensitive Person is so much more sensitive to external and internal stimuli they need to be more pro-active to reduce stress levels. Anxiety and stress are high in our western busy and over-stimulated way of life. But that doesn’t mean just because you are a highly sensitive person or highly empathic that you need to suffer from chronic anxiety or chronic stress.

Chronic Stress As A Highly Sensitive Person

Chronic stress is triggered by our fears, it is our reaction to the world around us, the way we psychologically and physiologically respond to situations, people, and the things around us. The biggest cause of stress today is our mental thoughts; our conditioning, what we attach and give power to.

But external stimuli such as environmental noise,  information overload can certainly play their part so can environmental and internal toxins. But the way we view the world, situations, very much represents how we show up in the world. If you are an HSP, a highly sensitive person who views the world as a highly harsh, uncaring, and dangerous place. You will show up in the world as a very fearful, highly anxious, sensitive soul. Who struggles to survive never mind find their way in the world.

The highly sensitive person or highly empathic person has tremendous gifts to share with the world. They have tremendous compassion and huge insight into those around them. Because they are highly intuitive and highly sensitive to the energy and emotions of the people and situations around them. But this also makes them more vulnerable to other’s anxiety and stress, to mass consciousness, and to many other things that most people can comprehend.

Some famous people who have been regarded as HSP a highly sensitive person include Albert Einstein, Carl Jung, Diana- The Princess Of Wales, Judy Garlan, Mother Theresa. You can learn more about a highly sensitive person’s traits here.

5 Simple Ways A HSP- A Highly Sensitive Person Can Reduce Stress Daily

Assertiveness- learn how to say NO, one of the biggest challenges many HSP’s and particular empaths have a challenge with. Is the ability to say NO. Empaths feel others’ pain and fears so deeply they often struggle to identify their own needs. So struggle to set healthy boundaries.

Be Yourself – trying to fit in, comparing yourself to other’s, judging yourself on other’s ideas of what you should and shouldn’t be like. Is a huge source of distress.  You are more than enough, even in within your vulnerability, your physical, emotional, and even mental sensitivity, you are enough. You are unique, special, wonderful and here to be you.

Groundedbecome more grounded physically, mentally, and emotionally get out of your head, and get connected to your body and the earth around and underneath you. I find the essential oil blend On Guard a great aid. When you are more grounded your energetic field is much stronger so you are naturally more boundaried to other people’s negativity and emotions.

Be In The Moment– learn how to be more present, more in the moment, take each step, each day as it comes, let go of yesterday’s and tomorrow’s, see below as meditation and mindfulness can help. You tend to be more grounded and find it easier to naturally assert your own needs when you live in the moment.

Meditatemeditation is a powerful way to connect with the self, that space where stillness and calm resides, where wisdom, true insight and guidance evolves from. Meditation helps quieten the mind and helps develop a powerful connection with our inner wisdom.

Unplug- a highly sensitive person or highly empathic person usually needs to unplug and switch off more frequently than other’s do. HSP’s tend to have sensory processing issues which affects the autonomic nervous system. So the slightest over stimulation can trigger the “fight or flight” stress response. Leaving the HSP highly wired, anxious, stressed, and exhausted.

Cushioning – is a stress management strategy that helps cushion you from the impact of a stressor or stressors. It involves using any practical, therapeutic, or strategical strategy that will help you reduce stress and become more resilient to the stressors of everyday life. It can involve taking action, managing or reducing the stressor in question but also includes an aspect of balance into your life. It involves having a more healthier approach to your everyday life, so you are generally more stress-resilient. I have extreme noise sensitivity which is exacerbated by medical challenges so I use earplugs when required. I plan out all activities, visitors, and overstimulation with plenty of quiet time. For many sensitives, this is a key part of remaining healthy,  calm, confident, and strong.

No matter how long you have suffered chronic anxiety or chronic stress due to your hypersensitivity. You don’t just have to live with it, your life as an HSP doesn’t have to be stressful. I was a highly anxious, stressed out teenager, who suffered chronic unworthiness, who tried to relentlessly to deny and resist my empathic traits and highly sensitive traits. I started to suffer extreme health challenges including burn-out from the age of 19. And spent a large part of my twenties extremely ill, exhausted, and isolated. Out of this experience, I became a meditation teacher, healer, coach, and stress management expert. I have helped many people including many highly sensitive people and highly sensitive children move from a highly anxious state of being to a more calm confident way of being.

I realise how challenging life may feel at the moment. But believe me your life as a highly sensitive person can be far richer, peaceful, lighter, and FREE.

Download How To STOP And Let Go Of Stress Today Click Here

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Essential Oils For Empaths And Highly Sensitive People

Essential Oils For Empaths And Highly Sensitive People

Essential Oils For Empaths And Highly Sensitive People

The many benefits of essential oils for empaths, highly sensitive people and healers. As a qualified aromatherapist for many years in many ways I take for granted how versatile essential oils. As I have used essential oils for nearly 30 years to support my own physical, mental and emotional wellbeing.

Essential Oils For Health And Healthy Boundaries

There are so many essential oils to choose from today, it is important you choose the right essential oil that is therapeutically safe and right for you. Many people assume all essential oils are completely safe because they are natural but like every herb or essence each has unique properties.

Some essential oils have analgesic or anti-inflammatory properties, some like peppermint which is used in mainstream medicine can be a digest aid. Some essential oils like tea-tree and thyme have anti-bacterial and anti-viral properties. But pure essential oils don’t just support us physically, but mentally and emotionally. Essential oils like Clary Sage and Geranium are used to help balance hormonal imbalances in females. Some are safe when your pregnant some are not, some are unsafe if you suffer from epilepsy, some essential oils should never be used on children or infants.

Quality Essential Oils For Empaths And Highly Sensitive People

If you are using essential oils therapuetically you also want to choose a high grade quality pure essential oil especially if your are highly sensitive and/or empathic. Highly Sensitive People tend to be not just sensitive emotionally and mentally but physically to both allopathic and natural medicine. Empaths often struggle with grounding and often have a much porous energetic field. So it is important if you are an aromatherapist to choose quality essential oils for empaths and highly sensitive people.

As someone with chronic health challenges I have used essential oils for approx 30 years. In many ways I found essential oils a great replacement for so many things normally in one’s medicine cabinet.

In-fact recently as someone who became completely housebound due to extreme noise, vibration and light sensitivity which would trigger seizures. I was looking for anything to support me after Neurologists told me nothing could be done and any medication would cause further complications.

But when I started to use Doterra’s high vibrational essential oils. I couldn’t believe how much physically stronger and boundaried I  started to feel.

Those of us who are more sensitive and or empathic tend have a more sensitive central nervous system. And are energetically more vulnerable to environmental stressors- EMF’s, noise, light, other people’s emotions and physical pain.

Essentails Oils For Empaths With A Sensitive Central Nervous System

As someone who has had rare neurological complications from suspected bacterial and viral complications for approx 30 years.  I have used a wide range of high quality essential oils and blends. One that has been really supporting me energetically and as a support to my immune system has been the On Guard Blend. Which instantly made me feel more energetically stronger and protected.

Essential Oils For Empaths and Highly Sensitive People

So What Are The Perfect Essential Oils For Empaths And HSP’s?

Balance – The Ultimate Grounding Blend– A blend of Spruce, Ho Wood, Frankincense, Blue Tansy, and Blue Chamomile with Fractionated Coconut Oil.  Empath’s and hsp struggle to feel grounded. This can be added directly to the skin or added to a diffuser for car, home, office. Frankincense is deeply grounding and Spruce  was used by the Native Americans fo various spiritual and medicinal purposes ( spruce tree regarded as sacred)

Frankincense  – is deeply relaxing, calming very popular to assist meditation, deeply grounding. Also helpful in supporting healthy cellular function and great rejuvenetaor for the skin.

Melaleuca (Tea Tree)is an extremely versatile oil for your home first aid kit. It is also anti-viral, anti-bacterial oil, that supports immune system. It is also useful at creating stronger boundaries

On Guard –  Can help support your immune system. Can help strengthen your energetic field to create stronger resilience, stronger boundaries. Helpful to protect against environmental threats. Safe for use on countertops, as a non-toxic cleaner, or to purify the air though diffusion

OreganoVery powerful for boundaries can help stop parasitic energy.  Can assist with healthy digestion and supports healthy respiratory function. May help support a healthy immune system. Useful as a powerful cleansing and purifying agent.

Patchouli Essential Oil – Provides a grounding, balancing effect on emotions • Promotes a smooth, glowing complexion • Add to your daily moisturizer to help reduce the appearance of blemishes.

Purify –Protects against environmental threats such as EMF’s and toxins. Can help clear the air and negative, stagnant energy in your home.

Sandalwoodanother favourite of mine, deeply grounding, great for the skin. For those of us who tend to avoid or reject our masculine energy. This can be a great balancer, it can also be useful as a soothing rub on the chest or neck with chest and throat infections.

Serenity Restful Blendcan be a useful aid for those struggling with anxiety, stress, over thinking. It also can help you connect more with the self, connect with your own inner calm. So great aid for those of you who struggle to meditate, be still.

Whisper Blend For Women – a gorgeous blend of jasmine and ylang ylang (  I adore ylang ylang) pathchouli, vanilla, cinnamon and cocoa.  Useful to support any unresolved issues you may have with your femininity, mother, grandmother or other close women figure in your life. Useful at helping ease unreleased anger.

Wild Orangeone of doterra’s most popular oils, this has a gorgeous sweet scent. It is uplifting, energising and stimulating. Helpful when your feeling flat from other’s negative emotions.

Ylang Ylang – I  have always been a huge fan of ylang ylang which is known by some as the oil of the Inner Child. As an aromatherapist I would recommend to clients who suffered nightmares. I find it helps support you have a much more soothing sleep often with sweet dreams. It is also a reputed aphrodisiac.

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Why The Highly Sensitive Empath Needs To Ground

Why The Highly Sensitive Empath Needs To Ground

So why does the Highly Sensitive Empath Need To Ground More? How is grounding so soothing and important for HSP’s?

As a Highly Sensitive Empath, it took me many years to realise how ungrounded I was. Despite being a healer for 30 years, I didn’t start to fully appreciate the true level of grounding and why I struggled with it till my 40’s.

Now, grounding may sound like a lot of new-age hippy nonsense. But the reality is grounding and earthing is part of our innate nature. We are humans whose natural habitat is the earth. And part of being physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually balanced involves being connected to our nature, our natural surroundings, and to the earth.

What are Grounding And Earthing?

Basically grounding and earth involves different acts or habits that will naturally help you “ground” or reconnect you to the earth and nature. Grounding is actually something we would naturally do years ago. But sadly a lot of modern life especially city and town living has played a large part in disconnecting us from something that at a core level is innate.

The Highly Sensitive Empath In The Modern Environment

The truth is we all need to ground more especially when we are surrounded by technology, metal, concrete, toxic, plastic, and mand made fabrics. When we are exposed daily to high amounts of Electro-Magnetic Frequencies which contain damaging free radicals and positive electrons. Instead of natural fresh air, bright v.itamin boosting sunlight

But for the Highly Sensitive Empath, the modern environment and way of life can be extremely harsh. Many HSP’s and most empaths are so sensitive to their surroundings, the energy of others and to the external world, they are often not fully grounded in their body.

I know as an Empath and Highly Sensitive Person I was very different from my 8 siblings. Very sensitive to all sorts of things from a young age that dramatically increased at certain stages in my life.  My heightened awareness of other people’s needs and emotions, even trauma made me more out of my energy field in some ways than in. 

Even though I do work online I find too much EMF exposure can play havoc with my central nervous system at times. And find too much noise and busyness extremely physically and mentally exhausting. You just need to look at a child with sensory processing issues to see how much they are challenged by our chaotic toxic crazy life. A reason why we should be teaching children to ground more.

Why Highly Sensitive Empaths Are More Easily Stimulated And Uncentred

The highly sensitive person especially those that are empathic are already more hypersensitive to everything around them. They often struggle with too much sensory processing, get easily overstimulated, and can pick up and be more sensitive to the energy and frequencies around them. Many find the harsher energies and reality of modern-day living quite frantic and some overwhelming and traumatic. This is especially evident in many children who have serious sensory processing issues with autism. This busy crazy chaotic life is often too overwhelming for the physical, mental, and emotional body. And often in these experiences, the body want’s to like climb out of the energetic body, which leaves them ungrounded. Many HSP’s suffer from chronic anxiety and stress.

The Highly Sensitive Empath And Burn Out


Why The Highly Sensitive Empath Needs To Ground More,

In-fact many highly empathic Hsp’s end up with some sort of burn-out, Adrenal Fatigue, or other chronic health challenges. The Highly Sensitive Person who is ungrounded is more likely to suffer from exhaustion especially Adrenal Fatigue or other chronic health challenges. I myself was diagnosed with severe M.E. in my early twenties, a time in my life when this debilitating fatigue and exhaustion left me predominately housebound and bedbound for about 7 years.

Now years later my diagnosis would be not just M.E. but a whole long list of other complex medical challenges including a high probability of late-stage Lyme.

But the reality is many Empaths and HSP’s are so finely tuned to their environment they are high-wired to function at a completely different level as other people, In many ways, their central nervous system is working so much harder. They are far more vulnerable to exhaustion, fatigue, dis-ease especially for the empath with boundary issues. If you are a bit of an unruly empath you will constantly be picking up and even taking on the emotional and physical wounding of others. 

So How Can A Highly Sensitive Empath Ground More

  1. Get outside more especially in nature, the countryside, forest, park even walking in some grass
  2. Get barefoot as much as you can, get those shoes, boots even slippers off
  3. Become more body aware, feel into your physical body, feel into your feet. Tai chi and Qi Gong exercises can be a great way to become fully in the body and become more grounded. They can also be extremely useful at helping empaths dispel negative energy they tend to absorb or take on.
  4. Reduce time spent online, on your computer, phone. Consider switching off your internet hub when sleeping to reduce EMF exposure. And spend more time on self care and self love.
  5. Bring more plants into your surrounding, your office, your home, your garden, things like cacti and other EMF reducing plants. These are great to sit next to your computer to help reduce EMF exposure
  6. Use grounding devices and grounding support aids, I use an electric bed to keep slightly upright in bed which is certainly not ideal. So I use a crystal grounding mat in my bed and grounding crystals under my bed.
  7. Reduce stimulants such as caffeine, sugar, alcohol, nicotine these play havoc with your central nervous system and impact your ability to feel more balanced and grounded.
  8. Use grounding essential oils like frankincense, sandalwood, vetivert, doterra has an amazing grounding oil  Balance as well as more a protection oil – On Guard ideal for HSP’s. (Contact me directly if you would like to learn more.)
  9. Learn to be in the moment, being in the moment encourages you to be more physically in and aware of your physical body. This is especially important for people with any sort of physical trauma to their body, car accident, traumatic operation, long-term physical violence. The last place people with those sorts of issues want to be is in their body because of the pain or shock but this causes huge emotional disharmony in the mental, emotional, and energetic body.
  10. Learn To Meditate; meditation not only helps us be in the moment, feel calmer, but can help us feel more grounded especially if it is more proper traditional meditation rather than more guided meditations that are actually more guided visualisations where the person is in their head or heart, often out of their physical body.

As someone who has had extreme challenges around being grounded and fully in my body. I have spent nearly 30 years looking for answers and help to many of my challenges.  I found that many of the grounding techniques that as I was taught as a healer just didn’t work for me. So as I started to study this topic a lot more deeply working with many top healers around the world. I quickly realised that grounding has to be the or at least one of the first skills Empaths need to master. Especially today when we are so disconnected from nature and balance. That is why I created Grounding Tools for Empaths– a grounding toolkit for empaths and highly sensitive people. Powerful yet simple and easy grounding tools, techniques, and even products that will help you feel more grounded and balanced on a daily basis.

Would You Love Some Support With Your Empathic Challenges? Eileen offers both coaching and healing sessions for the Empathic Female Entrepreneur. Book Your Free Discovery Session Today to see how I can help.